I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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