He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
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Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
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Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
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