you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We're too hungover to prance.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize