that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize