the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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