My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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