I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
bring money and cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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