My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize