That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize