I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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