I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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