She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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