Sponge bath it is.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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