I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
God, I missed his penis.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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