Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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