is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize