Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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