I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize