wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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