He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
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