eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize