Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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