I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
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My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
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His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize