What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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