he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
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"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
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Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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