Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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