I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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