You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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