david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize