plz talk dirty to me
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize