I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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