I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Watching her eat just hurts me
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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