id be glad to
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
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Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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