dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize