he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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