I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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