dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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