This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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