whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
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so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
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So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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