dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
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I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
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Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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