We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize