did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
3pm strippers are depressing
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize