sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize