How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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