she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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