yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize