I'm so fucking centered right now
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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