I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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