Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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