Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize